A friend asked me for some tips on hiring a coach for one-on-one coaching. Knowing that I have experience in this space, she thought I might have a view on what to look for in a coach. Not surprisingly, I do!
It takes a bit of effort to hire a coach and to have a useful experience.
Not because there are not great coaches out there. There are.
And it’s not because it’s difficult to find one in your specific area of requirement. It’s not.
What is needed is some up-front thinking. It starts by going IN(side our heads) before going OUT(side to what the coach can offer us).
Here is my starting advice on what to look for and what to ask (yourself) when hiring a coach.
Go INside first: Am I willing to act based on the conversations and insight I gain from this person?
If I am looking for a chat and chewing the fat, then I need to be clear about that in my mind. But if I am looking for transformation, the need to act, then I need to be realistic. Am I willing to take responsibility and action accordingly? By all means, have a conversation with your coach on accountability (especially if it’s a challenge), but it’s not the coach’s role to do the work for you. If you are not willing to do the internal and external work, then don’t take on a coach. You are wasting your time and money. And their time and money.
Am I open to being coached by this person?
Coaches are always looking for whether the person they are investing in is also coachable. No point spending energy with someone who is not going to listen, let alone act.
Being coachable is a mindset and an attitude. It means being open to and receiving feedback, being humble enough to recognise I don’t know the answer, and that a coach is better equipped to help me find the answer. Am I coachable? Do I see myself as a work in progress rather than a finished product?
Can I trust this person?
It is a fundamental question for me. If I don’t trust my coach, I will not be able to be open with them. And I won’t be able to learn effectively and gain value out of the relationship. Many conversations can end up being raw and open. You are inviting someone into your thinking, your business, and your inner sanctum. If you don’t trust your coach, you won’t get the best out of the relationship. How do you check? Trust your gut. And if you are still not sure, don’t be embarrassed to ask. Ask them what their values are? How do they trust, and who do they trust in their life? Ask: do YOU trust YOU? Get a sense of why they are trustworthy.
Do they have my best interest at heart?
A slight twist on the above question and it’s a tough one to answer, but I always check-in with myself on this. For example, if anything smacks of the coach trying to upsell me or on-sell me (when I haven’t even started yet!) I know I will have a problem. It is an indicator that it is about them and their product/service/business and not about me.
So what does “best interest look like”? Many coaches will do an interest interview with you – where you are both seeing if this will work – so this is the best time to test this out.
HINT: If they don’t do it, ask for a free, no-obligation 15-30 minutes consultation (especially if you don’t know them). And please don’t waste their time. Do your homework – internet search them or ask for industry recommendations. Be genuine in your approach.
Back to “best interest at heart.” Some things to look out for: Are they positive, enthusiastic, and responsive when approached? Are they respectful of my time? When they listen, do they listen to understand me? Is there an equal balance of asking me questions vs. talking about their experience and knowledge?
DOUBLE-HINT: If you reached out to them, they need to be asking you more questions! You, presumably, have already checked them out!
Will I do more with them than if I did it (whatever I am getting coached on) on my own?
Another critical question to ask because I want to make sure I level-up with a coach.
There is no point in hiring a coach if I am not looking to go to the next level.
Levelling up could be about gaining insight, getting advice, doing something (action), or just clarity and clearing out of the brain muck. You need to ask yourself whether you will move forward faster and with great clarity by hiring this coach than if you did it independently.
Sometimes a coach comes in because we are wobbling on something. For example, not sure about a business direction or a career transition, but the result is the same. When I come out of the conversation/relationship with my coach, will I have levelled my understanding and cleared the wobble? If I won’t, then it is not of value, and I need to find someone else.
“Coaching helps you stop the crazy mind chatter in your head that tells you all the time that you’re not good enough” – Oprah Winfrey
Do I have a pressing need that must be addressed in the most effective way possible?
Time is critical for all of us. So we want to quickly address WHY I want a coach and WHAT I am being coached on. We can all read books and online articles, synthesise information and talk to others about things. If, however, I have a pressing WHY and WHAT and don’t have the time or know-how, then a coach is a robust and effective way to work through the muck.
HINT: Sometimes we are not clear on the WHAT and that is ok, and the HOW will be provided by your coach, but please try to work out WHY you want a coach.
And bragging rights is not a good enough reason…and someone suggesting you get a coach is also not a good enough reason. YOU need to be clear on your WHY. *
Am I willing to pay them for the knowledge, not the hours?
This is critical. Many of us coaches/creatives/freelancers have experienced people who contact us to “pick your brain”…for free. I get it. We all do it more or less.
There is a fine line between free advice and exploiting someone. I can’t give you clear guidelines as people’s tolerances differ significantly, but we need to be willing to pay for someone’s experience.
The following famous story about Pablo Picasso’s response to an admirer illustrates this point best. An admirer approached Mr. Picasso and said, “Mr. Picasso, would you draw something for me?”.
He smiled, grabbed her napkin, and drew a quick, beautiful sketch in less than a minute. He gave it to her and said, “That will be $10,000.”
The woman was shocked! “But you only spent a minute drawing this. It’s hardly worth $10,000!” To this, Picasso replied: “It may have only taken me a minute to draw this for you — but it took me a lifetime to become a master.”
And I would add, a lifetime to become Pablo Picasso where his talent is worth millions!
I always look at value, experience, and wisdom. It is not the hour or the sessions or the coaching program; it’s the knowledge and outcome that I am seeking. You must ask yourself: are you willing to pay for the mastery the coach has in the topic you wish to level-up in? Or are you looking for hours and sessions? Outcomes vs. inputs?
I hope my thoughts have given you some food for thought. It’s not meant to scare you off getting a coach or make it harder than it needs to be. Having a coach in your corner can be life-changing and transformational.
If you spend the time, money, and energy hiring a coach to guide you, you want to make sure you are best set up for success and know what to look for.
Here’s to your success and happy coaching.
x Hala
* 10 Reasons to Hire a Business Coach Now | Inc.com
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